My story about my surgeries

I was in the study for bilateral DBS implants for tremor (an ANS Activa unit).

I had my series of operations in October of 2006 around Halloween. Isn't that a sign? I was gonna dress up as Uncle Martin for Halloween. I spent one night in Methodist Hospital for the lead implants and day surgery for the IPG installation.

I'm a guy and I had generous (?) hair before. I told the nurse to take a little off the sides. I asked what was the hold up, it wasn't like it was brain surgery. oh,yeah, it was. My guy skint me pretty good and I wore a little hat (kind of like Gilligan's but muted flowery) in public, including in church. (However, I'm told hats are a no-no. Now they tell me! Because of danger of infection, the bad case scenario). It takes probably 3-6 weeks to get it back. Actually, because of the shaved head and all, I stayed out of the public eye until I felt ready to come out. I was afraid of upsetting the grandkids, but one granddaughter didn't like the hat!

Since I had bilateral, they put the IPG's in two weeks later and shaved some again. Coincidentally they took out the staples at the same time. I like to get my money's worth when I get a haircut, so it gets ragged before I go, and if I comb it just so, I can see the surgery spots through the hair. My head feels lumpy and one can feel the leads coming down the side of my neck (under the skin). The IPG for one side is above my collar bone and is clearly visible without my shirt. I got bilateral as I was in a bilateral study but the right brain side doesn't do anything as far as I can tell. The other one is in my gut. Since then I talked to the programmer and he said their location is dependent on the short lead lengths provided with them. While I complained about the one in my abdomen being right where I bent over counters and things, he said most complaints were about the chest ones affecting golf and tennis swings!

They say that the brain has no feeling but the skull sure does! I said it felt like he'd used a jackhammer to make the holes. I asked if there was a chunk I could keep for a souvenir, he said as he drilled that there wasn't anything to save. I got scared at one point and made the nurse (who was looking me in the eye and relaying my reactions to changes) come back. Actually, the second surgery hurt worse than the first.

So far I am happy as a lark. I had my programmer crank mine up till my voice slurred and then back off. The change in tremor on vs off is dramatic. Just like that video of the guy who wrote the song "Don't Shake My Hand it Shakes Just Fine by Itself."

Boy, when my IPG for the tremor side turns on, I can feel it in my face and my mouth-droop disappears. It's an Activa and I call my remote switch my garage door opener. I am not crazy about turning it off as it makes my hand and arm tired to flop like a fish so much.

In 2007 I had my hand operated on. When they went to put in a drip I had to turn off the DBS for the EKG and my hand was flopping like a fish. It was the arm to stick and the one that doesn't flop was the one to work on. The nurse said if I hold it, will it stop shaking? I said no, then she'd start shaking. She said I'm gonna get a nurse to hold it while I stick it, that should keep it still enough. I said unless she's a good looking nurse, then it'll flop more.

The next time I went in for hand surgery, it was the other way around. The nurse looked at my flopping hand kid of concerned and I said to her, "Don't worry it'll stop flopping when I fall asleep." I knew what she was thinking.

The next thing to get fixed was my enlarged prostate. I knew it was gonna have to be done sooner or later and I already missed the height of the fishing season so I figured sooner was better than later. On the day of the surgery, we had to be there at 5:30 a.m. An old friend of ours was the anesthetist, and I warned him to look for a surprise when I got into the operating room. Marty has some googly eyes in her craft supplies and I snagged two of them and pasted them on the soon-to-be-star of the operating theater. I'd have given $10 to see the look on the operating teams' faces when they peeled back my gown!