Green Shamrocks

Well, this calls for the painting of green shamrocks story.
The set up: Everybody knew we engineers painted the campus green during Engineer's Week. It was tradition, same as serenading the business school during class by singing ribald stanzas to the Engineer's song, and sitting in the student union non-chalantly in our groadiest get up. One year they put a skunk in the business school building.

Enter Vic, known throughout the school as VD (my initials). My senior year I decided to paint the campus green myself as the tradition clashed with everybody else's plans for the night. I sat on a bench with a can of oil-base paint to paint green shamrocks all over every glass window I could find. A watchman sat with me, tacit approving of my plans. Better wait till after 10 he said. So I went home to return at 10.

I came back at 10 and was calmly painting shamrocks on the windows of the Science & Engineering Building when a guard approached on a Cushman. "What're you doing?" "I'm painting green shamrocks." What a stupid question, I thought. But he wasn't done. "You'll have to wipe that off!" he exclaimed. I used my moth-eaten gloves to wipe off a shamrock. Lucky he didn't see the other side of the building.

"We're gonna have to go to the maintenance building so I can call the police," he said. I trudged along afoot while he was on the Cushman. I toted the open can of paint (no lid) and my paint brush. Eventually we came to a fork in the sidewalk. One way led to certain ignominy, the other way to freedom. I took off running across the grass, jumping hedges and knee high chains meant to keep people on the sidewalk. I was just coming to a hedge when he yelled "Stop, or I'll shoot!" I didn't even turn around as I kept running and yelled back, "Then you better shoot because I ain't stopping!" Expecting bullets to zing around me, I ran all the way back to my apartment. None did.

I creeped back around midnight, only to see a Cushman cruising around without lights headed my way. I skulked back to my apartment to hide out till 2 am. I returned again, he was still patrolling on his Cushman w/o lights.

I skulked back around 3 am and he was gone. I was just finishing a few last windows behind a bunch of bushes when here he comes up the sidewalk. I hid in the dark in the bushes as he stopped to look at the doors to the student union. Shamrocks, my initals VD and BFD and EC were everywhere. He just hung his head and shook it sadly and drove back to his building. For you neophytes, BFD stands for Big F----g Deal and Ec stands for either enjoy COORS or Engineer's Club.

I liked the jay-walking great escape, it just reminded me of my shenanigans.